i cant do this. i jus cant. i cant forget or anything.
i cant. i jus cant. im sorry i made your life so miserable.
im so sorry. im reall reall sorry.
i am gonna try and ask you to be together with me again tomorrow, i just cant bear being without you<3
hope fer the best ><

Labels: *hopes i win ur heart

Labels: i really love you

I cant focus ever since i left her.
Things feel so plain.
What have i to anticipate for.
I cant control my anger.
Vulgarities seemed to become part of me. Im going haywire. Save the awkward things and all.
Save those who are hurt in the process.
Save all the disaster that ive create.
Save all the tears.
Save all the pain.
Save all the embarrassments.
Save all the pretence.
Save all the hello and goodbyes.
Save all the smiles.
Save all the worry.
Save all the uncertainty.
Save all secrets from spilling.
Save all the sweet memories.
Let's put a stop to all these.
Let's stop things from becoming more complicated.
I know, things aint that simple from the start.
There werent just me and you.
I was naive and all.
Sorry sorry and sorry.
But suyin, i really loved you. what should i do?
How i wish we met earlier.

Labels: Confusion and Coincidence

Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
Do you know you're unlike any other?
You'll always be my thunder, and I said
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors
I don't wanna ever love another
You'll always be my thunder
So bring on the rain
And bring on the thunder
Suyin, how i wished u know i liked u too. sigh.

Labels: my esctasy

Dying isnt scary right?
Being dead aint scary either i guess.
I think im not scared of death.
Its not at all scary la. Just as long as you dont feel pain.
The non-pain method of committing suicide will not be pain also what.
So why everyone so scared of dying?
Or they are afraid they wont be able to do something or see anyone anymore.
Ive got nothing to lose.
Just that i cant listen to my favorite songs anymore and i cant see my friends anymore and i cant talk anymore and i cant eat anymore.
But if im dead, i wouldnt care much will i?
If im dead, i dont have to face moments like that anymore.
Im not suffering from depression.
And im not turning crazy cause i still talk alot.
How do you describe those times when someone cause you to just break down?
Tell me what to do.
Everyone seem to have their life and problems to attend to.
I guess this is only for me to take and all.
Im scared.Im so scared.
That i wont be able to take it.
How am i suppose to stay fine? I feel like fainting but im not fainting and i cant faint.
If you call this sucidal thoughts, then im screwed.
Cause sucidal thoughts aint fine.Or its just self-pity.
What if you wont get to see me tomorrow like you do yesterday?
Will that matter much?
I really miss you.

Labels: domain of lost hearts

SPEECHLESS.
what can i do but to wait.
why dont it ever rain.
give me a chance to feel down man.
i miss you.
i cant even play the keys properly with your name in my head.

Labels: all mixed up

why do you always keep me alway with thoughts, i cant help but keep thinking of you.
1 minute to midnight was a thing.
1 minute pass midnight's another.
hate this me.
i really cant stand myself today.
if im someone else, i would have probably slap me.
no distinct idea why im like that, all i know is she being with someone made me like this.
But its my fault fer leaving her, i am starting to appreciate her, but its too late.
the red light came on.
its time to stop.
long john's drink make you cry.
my phone dropped twice today.
the weather's strangely cold when i want it to be.
tampines mall outdoor escalator's scary.
i dont wanna wait for you again.
the green man started walking.
its time to go.
how i wish you know i loved you.

Labels: one last chance?

i didnt noe why i cry again.
stupid me.
i really did not know why.
its just when i look at the sky.
tears just fall.
only two.



its you again. i think.
Suyin, i really miss you a whole fucking lot!

Labels: how i wish you knew.

i hope that this is not the end. it cant be. please god. dun let it be. i cant leave her just like that. i cant. i love her so much it has become part of my life. ahyo. it cant be the end. it jus cant be.
it jus happened so sudden. oh gosh.
up to today i still regret breaking with her, suyin.. i did not mean to do so.
if any chances you read this, forgive me please?
all i can do is cry cry and cry. wad worst can happen?
life ju cant be worst.
it jus cant be.
i will go kill myself if i cant be with her anymore.
i will.

Labels: you know that it beats fer you.

I asked God what have i done to deserve all these.
Mine heart hurts now from leaving he. but what i can draw comfort is that she will be happy with other guys.
But i really loved her very very much, how i wish i had not broken up with her, mine heart really hurts now.

Labels: please forgive me

It's funny how my eyes have been trained to such an extent that they're now certified 'hot girl GPRS'. In other words, I'm a 'pervert'. Why the inverted commas, you ask. Because well, I'm not actually one. I don't know how else to put this across. No one believes me anymore. Do I have to stop watching porn and start looking at guys' cocks? Wait, that'd only make matters worse, I'd be labeled 'gay' and 'homo' <_< What's with the random rants? Nothing different from the norm, I always do those. I'm just sick of doing my Maths homework.
I still cant let go of you, suyin.
Sigh.

Labels: i dont wanna lose you

It all started with coincidence.
Why why why.
Why did i mistook coincidence as fate.
Tell me. Its just pure coincidence.
Cupid does not exist. But i fell in love at first sight when i first saw you.

Labels: fuck the cupid

It rained halfway on PIE.
[Caution, Drive Slowly] reads on the screen.
Everything started to slow down.
And i saw things that i seen before.
The motorcyclists who stop to put on their raincoats.
Passengers pulling the safety belt.
Everyone preparing themselves for the rain.
Shielding themselves from the rain.
All i see last time were those raindrops on the window being swiped back by the wind.
Oblivious of the things happening around me. i only know its raining. Raining hard.
Now i learnt to look at things around me. the earth keeps on spinning. things keep happening. move on is what im gonna say.
yeah, you need umbrellas, raincoats, wellingtons.
but whats better than staying indoors.dry and Safe.
Away from girls, save mineself from the heartache

Labels: lovedrunk

I don't know where to start, but i don't want it to end.
"Have I missed the part that we knew each other before?"
No, i dont. You might, but please don't.
Goodbyes, curses and closing chapters,
leave them behind
I'll meet you at the sidewalks
on a one fine day
EVERYTHING
how could you be nothing?
you're every little thing.

Labels: u are my everything.

You're like the sun in the solar system, without you, my life is like the dark hole
Ok that was seriously random, but from the bottom of my heart. LOL!

Labels: loving you as always

The truth is from the monent i saw you.
I lived in constant thoughts of you
When i woke up in the morning till i fell asleep.
I had only one thought - YOU!
love is one big illusion
I have gotten all kinds of advise even from tarot cards.
But its not helping, i still lost you.
I still pretend that i dont love you.
I pretend that i dont give a shit, i dream abt it.
I really love you, but why must i be the one that leave u?
Please dont go, shaun i really hate you.
Seeing your couple ring made me cry a lot.
Please all tell me its a dream.
heavens please give me a chance to make things right..

Labels: nothing to say, tears to cry.

you are so near yet so far, i could see you but couldnt reach for you, i wished you were mine, but you will never be, i've been thinking, how nice would it be to be without a heart, at least i need not get tortured under th love for you, and need not be afraid that you would be gone, perhaps i would get to know you soon i dont know why i get emo when i see you but i'll get very excited too. i wished i could talk to you, but i couldnt so i have decided, to leave my love for heaven to decide i wont force anything, and let nature take its course perhaps its th best way for th both of us

As i was trying to sleep today, what you said interrupted me.
Every single sarcastic word you said to me hurts. Oh well, for the better i guess.
Your words disrupted mine thoughts, i cant think till now, what the hell man.
Mine mind is overloaded with image of you and shaun's couple ring.
Never claiming to like me, i was never sure.
Was never sure, but i still wrote it.
For you always, mine one and only.

Labels: so close yet so far.

Labels: head over heels for you.